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'Monogamy is an individual choice'
Manoj Bajpayee on casual hook-ups , sex and long-term relationships.
What's your definition of love?
When you feel concerned for the other person and miss the other person when she is not around, it's love.
Would you ever do a role that betrays your beliefs?
Definitely. I am an actor. My roles have nothing to do with what I personally believe in. That is why I have played so many shades of characters. My choice of a film depends on the character, script and story.
Can you tell us some of your all-time favourite romantic roles?
There's a movie called Falling in Love, starring Meryl Streep and Robert De Niro. It's an amazing story about real people. I would love to act in a remake of this film.
Which comes first - love or sex?
Love. Sex is the physical need and the extension of love. That is why it is called love-making.
What is your take on extra-marital affairs?
Nobody can say they will never happen.
How did you know she was the one?
When I first met her, I felt she was the one. She says she felt the same way. We have been together for ten years, married for four.
Is marriage necessary?
For us it was about fulfilling a social norm for our families.
Shouldn't marriages come with expiry dates? Or, better still, a return and exchange policy?
One needs to work on one's relationship and keep making it exciting, otherwise it can never last. My relationship is very beautiful and has evolved over the years. We try to do everything together - right from buying vegetables to going to a cinema hall, to travelling.
To what extent would you go to save your relationship?
I would go to any extent.
What would you not forgive in love?
I will forgive everything.
Is monogamy unnatural?
Monogamy is not unnatural or natural. It is an individual choice.
When a man and a woman fall in love, who should make the first move?
Anybody. In my case, I was quite aggressive.
How important is being in love to you?
It has taught me to be more patient and understanding.
When you are in love, what are the things you love to do?
Spend time with each other.
Love or arranged marriage?
I'd prefer a love marriage as both the partners can make a choice themselves.
What is the nicest thing about your wife?
Her caring nature. She is too giving.
Would you rather die with unrequited love or never loving anybody?
Unrequited love.
Do you think love will ever be dated?
Till humans beings exist, they will always have feelings. So love can never be dated.
Which is your favourite love song?
Today's Hindi film songs have neither poetry, nor composition. When we were dating, we used to make fun of all the love songs. But then there are a few gems like Dheeme Dheeme from Zubeida and Lady in Red by Chris DeBurgh that I like very much.
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Reader's opinion (6)
kudos ...fully agree to the answers.. great minds think alike ;)
straightforward answers! crisp interview..neat.
Manoj ,manoj ,manoj. We all love you. After reading your views on such an important topic in life ,my love for you has skyrocketed. Coming from a bollywood actor, where these values have no meaning ,it is really great . hats off dear.
Nice interview, but where is the actor in him these days?
Nice veeerynice!!!
Amazing interview. I loved the answer for the question - Which comes first, Love or Sex?

