A CONDO FOR MY CANINE

I am off to buy some art. Do you know of any good dealers?

I thought you didn't have an inch of wall space left.

It's not for my house but for Bruno's.

Since when did your pooch get a house? Can't he sleep on a mattress near the bed?

No way. Nothing but a bespoke cottage will do for my baby. I even roped in an architect to design it.

Don't tell me architects are now designing canine crash pads.

You'd better believe it. Barkitecture - everything from villas to haciendas - is all the rage these days. Designers say they're small and have room for lots of creativity. And good business, even in a recession.

They must cost a bomb.

Around $5000-20, 000. But it is nothing like your average smelly plastic or wooden crate parked in the garden with a bowl and gnawed bone in it. It is air-conditioned, carpeted, decorated with paintings, wired with muzak and mood lighting. And it certainly is not a doghouse Bruno should mind being consigned to.

Wow, one would need a home loan for that. But at least it means the dog will stop ruining the sofa.

You must be joking. You can't be cruel enough to keep the poppet out of the house if he doesn't feel like it - which he doesn't most of the time. Bruno loves to curl up at my feet and that is where he stays. The doghouse is like a second home he can retreat to when he needs a break.